Human beings have long been attached to the ideas of being special or unique. Looking around the world we live in today it would be difficult to deny this obsession we all have with being an exceptional individual. Individualism stems from our innate desire for recognition, validation, and a sense of significance in the world. We seem to have a burning desire to stand out, to be recognized as extraordinary, and to leave a legacy or lasting imprint on others and the world at large. Like everything else in this world where there is yin there in yang. The drive for excellence, personal growth, and achievement can be motivating but there are also drawbacks which can have a profound impact on our lives and on society as a whole.

Being obsessed with specialness has a downside which often creates intense pressures for others to conform to societal standards of success, beauty, intelligence, and or talent. It is not unusual to observe many people striving for exceptionality in various areas of their lives, such as careers, relationships, appearance or accomplishments. This constant need to stand out can lead to unhealthy competition, comparison, and a fear of failure. The fear of just being ordinary can be overwhelming and some individuals may go to great lengths to differentiate themselves at the expense of their own well-being or relationships.

This obsession with being special can also create a sense of entitlement and self-centeredness. For instance, when individuals believe they are special/exceptional they may develop an inflated sense of self-importance an entitlement, and therefore expect special treatment or recognition from others. The consequences of not recognizing our own investment in specialness has dire consequences for the world we live in. Moreover, the relentless pursuit of personal excellence can lead to a constricted focus of self often neglecting the needs and well-being of others.

Furthermore, the obsession with being special can contribute to a culture of comparison and envy. Which leads to the dilemma we have currently with Social media and the constant exposure to carefully selected and photo shopped representations of other people’s lives which only serves to exacerbate this situation. This phenomenon is known as ego comparisons. People compare themselves to the many streaming highlighted reels of a person’s life moments which may or may not be true. The consequences of comparing self to other fosters feelings of inadequacy and discontentment. Moreover, this can lead to a negative impact on mental health, and the individuals may experience anxiety, depression or a diminished sense of self-worth when they perceive themselves as less than or falling short of their own societal expectations.   

From the perspective of the well being of all, the obsession with individual specialness can lead to an imbalanced focus on personal achievements rather than the collective well-being of humanity. Unfortunately, society has a tendency to reward and exalt those who are deemed special or extraordinary often disregarding the contributions made by all the other individuals that make up the world we live in. Consequently, this can perpetuate inequality, as a marginalized groups or those who do not fit society’s narrow definition of exceptionalism may be disregarded or undervalued.

The current world situation is fraught with special interest groups which play a significant role in shaping our society this can have both a positive and negative influence in the world. Special interest groups are formed by individuals who share common goals, interests or identities and come together to advocate for their specific concerns or causes.

Again, we have an upside and a downside to this phenomenon of special interest groups. A special interest group can give voice to marginalized or underrepresented communities, allowing them to address their unique needs and challenges. Such as, groups for social justice, equality, and protection of human rights. They can raise awareness about import issues, mobilize support, and push for policy changes that benefit members of their groups or society at large.

However, because there is always an up and a down side to everything in the world, wherever there is lightness there will also be darkness. Polarization can arise from fragmented special interest groups and create negative consequences. When humanity becomes attached to or entrenched in their own beliefs and perspectives, it can lead to a breakdown in communication and understanding between them. Consequently, this could hinder constructive dialoguing and compromising, making it difficult to find a common ground or work towards a collective solution.

Therefore, in a fractured world with polarized special interest groups, there is a risk of increased social division and conflict. What we begin to see is an us versus them mentality, where people identify strongly with their own group and view others as adversaries. When there is an adversarial mentality the polarization can lead to hostility, violence, prejudice, and a lack of empathy towards those who hold different viewpoints or belong to different groups.

Moreover, the resulting fragmentation caused by polarization of special interests can impede societal progress. Instead of working together towards shared goals and finding comprehensive solutions, the goals are fragmented and dedicated to the advancing the specific special interest of the specific group. This myopic focus can result in a lack of collaboration, gridlocked decision making and an inability to address larger more systemic issues that affect society as a whole.

Last but not least I would be remiss if I did not present this from a spiritual standpoint. I will compare two similar points of view A Course In Miracles (ACIM) and Buddhism as both offer insights into specialness. They may have different frameworks and teachings, but they have common threads in how they approach the issue.

ACIM focuses on undoing the ego-driven belief of specialness and individuality. This is based on the idea that some people are more special, more valuable, deserving or important than others. According to ACIM this belief in specialness perpetuates a cycle of competition, comparison and conflict.

ACIM emphasizes the importance of recognizing the inherent equality and oneness of all beings. The teaching purports that true spiritual awakening comes from releasing the belief in specialness or any special relationship which includes family, significant others and friends. The Course teaches us how to embrace the idea that we are all equal children of a loving unified source, God. The path encourages forgiveness and the practice of seeing beyond the ego judgements. ACIM aims to guide individuals towards a state of shared purpose, love and unity.

From the Buddhist standpoint, specialness is also linked to the ego or the false sense of self. The ego creates a sense of separateness, attachment and craving which leads to suffering.

The Buddha teaches us to recognize our interconnectedness. Thich Nhat Hanh following in the Buddha’s footsteps teaches us in his writings that we “inter-are”, you are me and I am you and we share in this world together.  Therefore, when you suffer, I suffer and when there is peace we share in each other’s peace.  In the spirit of Thich Nhat Hanh, “you are therefore I am”. The interconnectedness of all beings is essential for the liberation from suffering.

Buddhists believe specialness reinforces the illusion of an independent and permanent self, contributing to attachment, aversion and ignorance. Through the path of compassion and wisdom individuals are encouraged to overcome the ego’s influence and realize their true nature, which is interconnected and empty of inherent existence.

Both ACIM and Buddhism emphasize the need to transcend the ego’s illusion of specialness and recognize the inherent equality and interconnectedness of all beings. Both paths offer practices such as forgiveness, mindfulness, compassion and cultivating wisdom to help guide individuals to move beyond the ego’s limitation and experience a deeper spiritual connection with others in the world.

In closing, by letting go of specialness and embracing the idea of inter-being, individuals can find greater peace, harmony and liberation from suffering in the world. Therefore, instead of disagreeing with each other it is essential to foster positive meaningful dialogue with empathy and understanding between groups that disagree. Encouraging respectful and open-minded conversations can help bridge divides and find common ground. Moreover, fostering a sense of shared humanity and interconnectedness can help counteract the polarization and fragmentation caused by excessive specialness.

In closing, it is imperative to keep in mind that in a fractured world it is crucial to recognize that while special interest groups have purpose and unique concerns and perspectives, it is also crucial to find ways to join and collaborate and work towards the common goals that contribute to the overall well-being and progress of humanity.